Couple Arguing on Green Sofa

30 Dec 2020

Anger – When does it become a problem?

Feeling angry is a normal emotion that can be evoked by feeling attacked, deceived, frustrated, invalidated or unfairly treated. Like most emotions, it has both positive and negative connotations. The plus side is that it can help us identify problems that need addressing, give us motivation to change behaviours and can help us to defend ourselves. On the other hand, it can lead to unhelpful and destructive behaviour which can damage relationships, block out other important emotions and become our ‘go to’ emotion in situations that would never have affected us quite so strongly before.


So, when does anger become a problem?

We all experience anger from time to time but sometimes it’s imperative to recognise when these feelings start taking over our everyday lives. Excessive anger can affect not only ourselves, but also the lives of those around us. This can sadly lead to irrevocable damage to relationships with loved ones.


Coping with anger outbursts

There are healthy ways in which we can learn to recognise and express anger, and being better able to manage this emotion can be hugely beneficial to both our mental and physical wellbeing.

The mental health charity Mind has some helpful suggestions on how to cope with anger issues on their site here: –

Mind suggests: –

  • Look out for warning signs that your anger is overwhelming you
  • Give yourself time to walk away and think about how you’d like to react in order to feel more in control
  • Get support from a professional to help you put in place healthy coping strategies
  • Talk to trusted friends and family members

If anger outbursts are getting to the point that it becomes violent or abusive in any way it’s important to look for suitable support. Learning what triggers your anger can be the first step to putting coping mechanisms in place, building better relationships and communication, and generally feeling more in control.

Our practitioners here at The Eaves can provide support if you’re struggling to manage your anger. We have highly trained Counsellors, Psychologists and Psychotherapists available across Surrey in Guildford, Godalming and Farnham. Support is available to individuals of all ages, families and couples. We’re open 12 hours a day, Monday to Saturday between 9am and 9pm.  Please call 01483 917000 to speak to a member of the referrals team if you would like any help sourcing a suitable practitioner.

You can also send us an enquiry. Click here to find out more.